“Whether they realized it or not, the actions of those who loved us in our youth are often more valuable than the written words of any ancient philosopher.” — Phil Van Treuren
When it comes to relationships, Stoicism teaches that the best way to show appreciation to important people in your life (whether spouses, friends or family members) is to provide them with respect, support, kindness and honesty.
It’s a common misconception that being Stoic means that you shouldn’t show emotion in relationships, but that’s not the case at all. Stoicism teaches that we should rid ourselves only of negative emotions that have a bad effect on relationships, like jealousy, anger and suspicion.
The best Stoic quotes on relationships teach us to see our loved ones as they really are, not how we wish they would be. And to appreciate the unique aspects of their own character and experiences that we can learn from and utilize to make our own lives better, as well. True Stoics look at relationships between people as one of the most important interactions that can be found in nature.
Stoic Quotes on Love & Relationships from Marcus Aurelius
“Accept the things to which fate binds you, and love the people with whom fate brings you together, but do so with all your heart.”
“Not to display anger or other emotions. To be free of passion and yet full of love.”
Stoic Quotes on Love & Relationships from Epictetus
“(Your love) has been given to you for the present, not that it should not be taken from you, nor has it been given to you for all time, but as a fig is given to you or a bunch of grapes at the appointed season of the year. But if you wish for these things in winter, you are a fool.“
“With regard to whatever objects give you delight, are useful, or are deeply loved, remember to tell yourself of what general nature they are, beginning from the most insignificant things. If, for example, you are fond of a specific ceramic cup, remind yourself that it is only ceramic cups in general of which you are fond. Then, if it breaks, you will not be disturbed. If you kiss your child, or your wife, say that you only kiss things which are human, and thus you will not be disturbed if either of them dies.“
Stoic Quotes on Love & Relationships from Seneca
“Nature bore us related to one another . . . She instilled in us a mutual love and made us compatible . . . Let us hold everything in common; we stem from a common source. Our fellowship is very similar to an arch of stones, which would fall apart, if they did not reciprocally support each other.“
“I shall show you a love potion without a drug, without a herb; without the incantation of any sorceress: if you want to be loved, love.”
“Whoever then understands what is good, can also know how to love; but he who cannot distinguish good from bad, and things which are neither good nor bad from both, can he possess the power of loving? To love, then, is only in the power of the wise.”