Stoicism isn’t just some dusty old philosophy — it’s also a practical toolkit for navigating modern life. When I was introduced to it years ago, I was amazed to discover that the lessons of the ancient Stoics were both simple and profound.
Stoic philosophers like Marcus Aurelius, Epictetus and Seneca weren’t just ivory tower thinkers. They were real people dealing with real problems. They figured out some pretty amazing stuff about how to live a good life, and their wisdom is just as relevant today as it was two thousand years ago.
Here’s a list of the most surprising life lessons I’ve learned from studying the Stoics. I hope they’re as helpful to you as they have been to me!
#1: I’m Not Required to Have an Opinion on Everything
Ever feel like the world is demanding your take on every little thing? From sports to politics, we’re expected to always have something to say — or, more importantly, to hurry up and “pick a side.”
I used to have strong opinions about everything — even stuff I knew little about. Admitting that I didn’t have enough information to form an opinion about something? That would have been showing weakness.
Stoic philosophy — Marcus Aurelius, specifically — helped me realize that I didn’t have to play that game. Avoiding hasty judgments isn’t weak; neither is refusing to join a “tribe.” And it’s okay to decide that some issues just aren’t worth my mental energy.
Now I don’t hesitate to say “Sorry, I don’t have an opinion on that.” And it’s made my life a lot happier.
#2: Help and Harm Are Only Found Within Myself
Epictetus taught that both help and harm come from within us . . . and when I first read about this concept, I thought it was nuts.
Like most human beings, I had spent my whole life assuming that anything helpful or harmful to me could only come from other places. From other people.
But Epictetus was exactly right: human beings are born with all the tools we need to face life’s challenges. And most “bad” situations only hurt us because we decide they do.
Once I took Epictetus’s advice to heart, I realized that the greatest help and harm really springs from my own mind. And that made the world a lot less intimidating.
#3: I Wasn’t Given Resilience Just to Have an Easy Life
Reading Epictetus also introduced me to this powerful truth: human beings aren’t born strong just to have it easy.
I’m not talking about physical strength; I’m talking about our ability to reason and remain resilient in the face of incredible challenges. We’ve got thousands of generations of toughness built into us, and our minds were shaped to tackle adversity.
Epictetus made me stop looking at challenges as something I have to face.
No, I get to face them. I get to go to work. I get to adapt to changes.
Birds weren’t given wings just to walk everywhere . . . and we weren’t born resilient just to have an easy life. This is what human beings were made for.
#4: I Can Choose to Be Happy Wherever I Am
Before reading the words of Stoic philosophers like Seneca, I was always thinking that happiness was “somewhere else.” In some exotic locale, in some far-away destination, in some distant adventure.
But Stoicism taught me that the grass isn’t greener on the other side — it’s greener where you water it.
Travel is great, but those exotic locations are made of the same stuff as your back yard. If you can’t find happiness here, you probably won’t find it there either.
Socrates nailed it when he asked a friend: “How can you wonder your travels do you no good, when you carry yourself around with you?”
Happiness isn’t about where you are. It’s about who you are. And that’s something you can work on right where you’re standing.
#5: No One Does Wrong Willingly
Ever catch yourself thinking, “I’m smarter than they are”? It’s a trap we all fall into sometimes . . . and for many years, those kind of thoughts stopped me from understanding how much I have in common with everyone else.
The Stoics helped me realize that everyone thinks they know something that other people don’t. It’s how human minds are wired. We all think we’re the smartest ones in the room, and that we make the best choices.
Socrates said “no one does wrong willingly.” People do what they think is smart, based on what they know.
Once I understood that we’re all just doing the best we can with what we’ve got, I became a lot more patient with everyone (including myself).
#6: My Hopes and My Fears Are Basically the Same Thing
Seneca wrote that Hope and Fear are pretty much the same thing . . . and it took me a while to understand just how powerful that concept is.
Hope and Fear both take us out of the present moment. They both make us focus on stuff that hasn’t happened yet. Stuff that might not happen at all.
This doesn’t mean Hope is all bad, of course. But Seneca taught me to not let it (or its kindred phantom, Fear) distract me from what’s happening right now.
Studying Stoicism helped me understand that the best way to shape my future is by focusing on what I’m doing in this moment. It’s where all the real work happens.
#7: I Don’t Constantly Need More Information and News
I used to be the kind of person who was always checking for breaking news, afraid to miss a single headline. I constantly chased after more information, more facts, more data.
Stoic philosophy (and especially the lessons of Epictetus) taught me that chasing after every new bit of information is like trying to count every drop in the ocean. It’s exhausting and, honestly, pretty pointless.
Instead, I’ve learned to focus on what’s right in front of me. The small stuff. The ordinary things. I don’t need to know everything to live a good life, and I don’t need to see every headline to be happy.
#8: There’s Comfort in Knowing the World Will Continue Without Me
Thinking about how I’m just a tiny blip in the grand scheme of things used to bother me (a lot).
I wanted my life and my accomplishments to be etched in stone; to last forever. I didn’t like that they were really just written in sand, soon to be washed away by the waves.
But the words of Marcus Aurelius and other ancient Stoics helped me appreciate the truly beautiful thing about our world: those waves will keep on coming. The mountains will still stand. The valleys will still be green.
I’ve learned to take profound comfort from knowing that the world will keep spinning, even when I’m gone.
Thanks to Stoicism, I’ve become more grateful for the time I have here — and I’ve learned to find peace in knowing that this amazing world will be here for others long after I’m gone.